Writer, artist, full time seeker of new and interesting things. Navigated the turbulent waters of infertility treatment.
I’ve always know I wanted to be a mom ….”someday.” When I decided it was time to take action to make motherhood happen, it just wasn’t happening. That’s when this whole thing began and I began documenting my experiences with fertility treatments and, as of Oct 2017, what happens after that doesn’t work.
Sept 2013 – Married J … start actively not preventing pregnancy
Nov 2013 -Talk with PCP about trying to conceive and really freak out about the pressure of having to force the whole thing thing
Flash forward to June 2016. Dr refers me to a fertility specialist. (If you want to read about it not in list form, start with this post.)
July 2016 – J does SA testing. Very humbling
Aug 2016 – Specialist visit. I cry a little. We do CD3 bloodwork that day (timing was amazing) and U/S following day. HSG scheduled for following week.
Sept 2, 2016 – oh boy did that HSG hurt. But I learned some things. Left tube totally blocked and dilated, for one.
Sept 16, 2016 – Fertility specialist Dr P suggests surgery to remove or isolate the left tube and possibly the right. My OBgyn gets on board with this and surgery is scheduled after what seemed to be one billion phone calls during work, while I try to keep my cool around my coworkers.
September 25thish – Another appt with fertility specialist Dr P where he confirmed the need for surgery and then talked about what the means as far as me getting pregnant. Again I cry when we talk about IVF.
Oct 20, 2016 – Surgery. Fascinating!! I remember everything up to the moment right after they strapped me on to the surgical table. Woke up later feeling deliciously sleepy. And then I learned that I have endometriosis! Severe! So they didn’t take anything out. They just separated the left tube from my uterus. (My friend and I equated it to gating her socially awkward dog in a bedroom while guests were over. It was just going to be better for everyone involved in that way.)
October 24, 2016 – Groggy still, J and I go see Dr P to discuss next steps and that means IVF. Yep. The very treatment that made me cry each time we talked about it. This time, no tears. We sign consent to start, given insurance approves. J has to “do it” in a cup again for another SA.
November 23,2016 – Day before Thanksgiving, insurance approves. (Thank you!) Now we wait for AF to start, which should be Dec 6. I appoint J as my “guardian of rest” to ensure December is less stressful than every December always is. That is, I always have a meltdown in December.
November 25, 2016(aka Black Friday) – WTF my period just started.
Monday am, Nov 28, 2016 – CD3 bloodwork and U/S. Confirming it was a real period and I start Altavera OCP.
Sunday, Jan 1, 2017 – Cycle cancelled. Not enough eggs to warrant a transfer.
Tuesday, Jan 10, 2017 — 10-hour ER visit with horrible abdominal pain.
Friday, Feb 10, 2017 — Surgery numero dos. Bye-bye left Fallopian tube and left ovary. You may now call me “Uni-Tube.”
Saturday, June 17, 2017 – IVF try #2 starts with estrogen instead of BCPs. Cycle started with suppression check on June 24 and dosing Gonal F 300 (2 x day) and then Microdose Lupron (2 x day). Feeling pretty darn good emotionally/mentally, but physically tired.
Thursday, July 6, 2017 – With one big egg, the cycle is cancelled and I take the HCG. Belly is so sore and bruised. Timed intercourse.
Week of July 16, 2017 – My RE informs me that IVF isn’t going to be any more effective than traditional TTC, and insurance won’t cover donor eggs for over 40s with my numbers. Soooooo…. now what?
October 2017 — we’ve made plans to go to the Resolve New England fertility and adoption conference. Signed up for all adoption workshops.
November 2017 — The fertility conference was pretty amazing. I felt the love of this broad community. We take in all we can about adoption.